I read this passage from Meditations and went “ouch”:
For how could we do what justice requires if we are distracted by things that don’t matter, if we are naive, gullible, inconstant?
Meditations, 11:10.
Ignore what he is talking about when he talks about justice (Nature’s highest aim, from which all other virtues flow).
What struck me is the bigger point. How can I do anything of value if I am gullible and naive?
And in real life, I am. I praise myself heavily (inside my head) for being willing to take people as they present themselves to me. That’s honorable in one way: don’t discard a person because of an opinion formed in your head before you even meet that person for the first time.
But it’s naive in another. People live in facades. They wear disguises. Sometimes the facades are deliberately intended to hide a truth from you, for good reasons (“Love me!”) or bad (“Trust me and let your guard down, so I can steal from you”).
Let’s acknowledge a truth here. I am not a shrewd judge of character. In fact, I’m terrible at it.
How can I be not naive, not gullible?
Time solves many of these problems. In time, a person’s true nature reveals itself.
Maybe learn to be cautious, wary. Wait for the reveal. And don’t dismiss the signals when they are given. Because that is something I do all the time. Second, third chances.
For myself, I want to live without a facade. I want to present myself to the world as I am, like a boxer in the ring, standing with his arms at his side.