Present, not past or future.
I keep asking “how do I live in the now?” The only thing I can conclude is that it is the wrong question to ask.
It’s time you realized that you have something in you more powerful and miraculous than the things that affect you and make you dance like a puppet.
Meditations, 12:19.
Perhaps the present eludes me because I seek it. It’s already here.
I woke up at 4:30 a.m. and lay awake for an hour, hoping to get back to sleep. Just feel your heart beat. Just breathe. All of these things I do, trying to put me in the present, trying to still the mind. All unsuccessful.
Squeezing a handful of sand ever tighter.
This activity (writing) helps me.
Awaken before everyone else in the house. Make coffee. Feed the dog. Read Marcus Aurelius. Make these little notations.
Calm.