Being able to admit you aren’t good enough at something instead of making excuses for failure is a super power.
https://mobile.twitter.com/Benaskren/status/1473893881989238785
I want to add a bit of clarification here. Don’t use this to excuse your laziness. “I am not skilled/strong enough to do X.” “No, asshole, you are just too fucking lazy to give a fuck at attempting X.”
So maybe I agree with this Tweet but am giving you a caution about where that limit actually is.
The effort you put in . . . builds you. So seek your true limit. Give a fuck. Give it everything you have.
Default to “I am lazy” (rather than “I am unskilled”) in your self-analysis and you won’t fall for this error. It’s like lifting weights to failure in order to find your true physical limits. anything short of that is a mental limit.
- When I broke my ankle climbing on Tahquitz. I was leading. Couldn’t pass the crux even after four efforts or so. Had to pendulum off to another wall to find another route. I found my limit.
- Canoeing in the Minnesota/Ontario waterways. I struggled carrying the heavy aluminum canoe across the portages and until I literally fell, physically spent, on a slippery path. When I got up I could not hoist the canoe above my head. I found my limit.
Anything short of that would have been a mental limit. In the first instance the pendulum resulted in a broken ankle. In the second, it resulted in a temporary ego-hit (I had to ask for help) and a deeper understanding of myself.
So. Maybe the superpower would have been to pick a route within my capabilities. Or follow rather than lead the crux pitch. But having committed, I went to the limit. No regrets.
Twenty-five years later, I found my physical limit, then asked for help and a different assignment for what to carry across the portages. This time, no regrets . . . and a bit of enlightenment.
Also, one final thing. The two examples from my own life are examples where I did it right. There are countless other situations where I was lazy or afraid and quit something well within my reach. I’m no shining star in this department.
But I remember the successes and use them as fuel. “You did it before. You can do it again.” The failures, I don’t bank those memories unless the memories provide building blocks for a better me today.