Maybe I should say it is a challenge to be bold, presented to me by a book.
I got the second Jordan Peterson book (Beyond Order). The title of Chapter 2 felt like a direct, personal exhortation:
Imagine who you could be, and then aim single-mindedly at that.
Problem. I don’t know what that is (but Peterson addresses that in Chapter 3). What could I be?
Answer. I don’t know. Murky, tentative, I’m afraid to pick one thing or another.
But! I have an idea of what I how I want to do it. Not the aim, but the physical method I will use, day in and day out, because I want to and because it is important and because, surprisingly to myself, I enjoy it.
I have the recent experience at work (the last week or so), which has changed my trajectory. It looks, well, better than what I was doing before. So I’m iterating towards . . . I don’t know.
I have today’s experience at the gym. The session was deeply rewarding. The reward was not in the accomplishment but in the being there, midday, getting sweaty and poking the boundary of my accomplishments outward just a bit.
A single-minded aim at the mundane — again and again. Do that thing at work. Again. Again. Again. Do that thing at the gym. Again. Bump the weight 10 pounds. Again. Again. Again. Pay attention to and support the people I love to the best of my ability. Again. Again. Again. Again.
Maybe that’s it. I’m finding inspiration in repetition and routine. Me, who has the attention span of a gnat.
So let’s just follow the “again” path for a while.
At work: no new customers. Care for those I have now.
In personal life: continue the daily practices I have embedded. Daily exercise, daily spiritual reading.
Amongst the humans: appreciate them, tell them so, and give gratitude and support as often as I can.
Again.
And again.
Then do it again.
And see where it leads.
I’ll give myself 1,000 days to see how it goes. I will expect zigzags and recalibration and resets. If a future choice presents itself, choose the harder path. When given a choice between more or fewer, pick fewer.
Excerpt
I’m putting this here, typed from the book with my very own thumbs, because someday I will want these words and the book will not be close at hand.
Aim at something. Pick the best target you can currently conceptualize. Stumble toward it. Notice your errors and misconceptions along the way, face them, and correct them. Get your story straight. Past, present, future—they all matter. You need to map your path. You need to know where you were, so that you do not repeat the mistakes of the past. You need to know where you are, or you will not be able to draw a line from your starting point to your destination. You need to know where you are going, or you will drown in uncertainty, unpredictability, and chaos, and starve for hope and inspiration. For better or worse, you are on a journey. You are having an adventure—and your map better be accurate. Voluntarily confront what stands in your way. The way—that is the path of life, the meaningful path of life, the straight and narrow path that constitutes the very border between order and chaos, and the traversing of which brings them into balance.
Aim at something profound and noble and lofty. If you can find a better path along the way, once you have started moving forward, then switch course. Be careful, though; it is not easy to discriminate between changing paths and simply giving up. (One hint: if the new path you see forward, after learning what you need to learn along your current way, appears more challenging, then you can be reasonably sure that you are not deluding or betraying yourself when you change your mind.) in this manner, you will zigzag forward. It is not the most efficient way to travel, but there is no real alternative, given that your goals will inevitably change while you pursue them, as you learn what you need to learn while you are disciplining yourself.
You will then find yourself turning across time, incrementally and gracefully, to aim ever more accurately at that tiny pinpoint, the X that marks the spot, the bull’s-eye, and the center of the cross; to aim at the highest value of which you can conceive. You will pursue a target that is both moving and receding; moving, because you do not have the wisdom to aim in the proper direction when you first take aim; receding, because no matter how close you come to perfecting what you are currently practicing, new vistas of possible perfection will open up in front of you. Discipline and transformation will nonetheless lead you inexorably forward. With will and luck, you will find a story that is meaningful and productive, improves itself with time, and perhaps even provides you with more than a few moments of satisfaction and joy. With will and luck, you will be the hero of that story, the disciplined sojourner, the creative transformer, and the benefactor of your family and broader society.
Imagine who you could be, and then aim single-mindlessly at that.
Jordan B. Peterson, Beyond Order: 12 More Rules for Life, pages 86-87.