I’m here.
Dominant attitude for the last several days: sad, numb, despair. Stuck.
Correlating facts: big projects long overdue, cash flow bad. Stopped the daily running because of a sinus infection, so lack of hardcore exercise. No daily reading (or skimpy efforts) and no writing here. Email inbox deep in unprocessed messages.
I’ve started daily practice of cycles (5 or 6) daily to get stuff done. It helps. I’m getting momentum at work.
I need a teacher, in the philosophical sense. We all go up and down emotionally. We can’t remain on the peaks at all times. Encouragement and exhortation from a trusted, insightful companion goes a long way to help us traverse the ravines.
I need practices and procedures in my life that are designed to survive the worst times. Don’t optimize for moments of peak performance. Build floors through which you cannot fall. It’s analogous to the “don’t be stupid” advice given to the question of how to succeed. Simply win by not making dumb moves, not by being exceedingly brilliant.
Acknowledge that my brain is a fart in a windstorm. I don’t keep on the beam for years at a time. Instead, accept this.
Ride the swells of interest and attention, and when they wane, grab the next swell, propelling me ever forward to the shore.
Which means of course that I need to keep in mind my Quest. Whatever that is.